Alzheimer Dad

Could be a byproduct of Hepatitis C, my life defying illness, or just poverty, or my perception that the mass manipulation of voting machines has changed this republic into a totalitarian regime..the voting machines becoming like those toy one armed slot machines for kids...pull on the arm and the wheels go round and round, producing nothing. The ability of the state to manipulate on this level is horrific, predicted by George Orwell so long ago..took 20 years longer than his predicted 1984 futuristic bleak utopia, but noone can prophesy everything, even seers can only see a glimpse into the future...artists of course better than others..the reports pour in of manipulation of the numbers..soon they'll come for the emailers and the bloggers..with only the info out in the stratosphere, maybe..unless we can get these maniacs out of power..where are our orange armbands in solidarity with the Ukrainians who are fighting for a fair election? Where is Kerry? Gore? Edwards? Kucinich? Why are there no leaders to protest this mass manipulation? Our trade deficit balloons even while the dollar tumbles on the world market...we have an open market economy..so we are free to compete with people who survive on $400 a year..thanks a lot, neo cons...

I visited Bev for a few days. Bev and my Dad lived together for 22 years after my mother died. I suspect they had had an affair before my mother died, too, but that was part of my parent's problem. My dad slept around and my mother drank to dull the pain. I used to beg her to leave him, but she toughed it out until she died of Emphasymea at aged 50. My sister dislikes Bev because she was one of my Dad's side projects, but I'm glad there's someone around who is older and nice to me. Besides, I had a fling with a married guy, and so did my sister, so I didn't think I was someone who could take the moral highground. I JetBlued' it down to Lauderdale, which is New Jersey by the Sea. They've outlawed grapefruit trees in people's backyard. My highschool buddy Joanne was there. She said the local officials huffed into her yard and hacksawed the grapefruit tree without batting an eyelash. Strange things in paradise. Black Box voting with no reciept. Voting into the void. This election was maddening. I hope they're counting the vote. They say the Ukraine was rigged. So was Ohio and Florida and New Mexico. We must look no further than the Pc's that tally the votes. Every major university from Johns Hopkins to MIT to Stanford say the tallies have been hacked. So what does one do?? Do I go shake my fists in front of the Board of election? Do I remain mum at home, knowing that if I email anyone, eventually I will become a target. I spent all my savings while on leave of absence from my job. I helped where I could at the Barbaro Campaign..but that thing was handled from day one with major ineptitude. I've been exhausted, and I went to Bev who had been lying in bed for a week and a half from Flu. Although she has emphasema and asthma and is 80, she couldn't go for a flu shot, because there was no vaccinne. She was too weak to stand on line. One man died on line down there, in the paradise of the old. The elephant burial ground. The old ladies sing together in a chorus. They've all outlived their hard working hubbies, and now buy too much jewelery and go to too many restaurants..and sleep alone and sing together, and read the obits for news of their friends..like war, only without the hope of it ending. Well, I hope to find some acceptance of death. I hope Bev does. She's alone since Dad fell apart from Alzheimers and then died. Her life is a nightmare, in a way..Alone...thank God she has some dough to pay for roofs that fall apart and pools that need repair and cars that leak oil..Anything is better than the precursor to the funeral parlor, the old age home. they're all pretty snazzy, but noone really wants to die. She doesnt'. I don't .
While I was gone, My son Jezz stayed with his friend Zak, and got to school on time, for a change. He even did homework when I got back from FLA..something he never does. He's functioning on a gentleman's C-, okay if you have a trust fund, murder if you're the son of a pennyless rock singer. The Cable is still off, and i'll put it on tomorrow, when my check clears.
I think I'm gonna try for a teacher's license. They say the economy in NY is fine, but I've sent out 15 resumes, and have gotten no responses. This is eeerie. Maybe I should try for a gig at the Supermarket. If I get the sub's license, there'll be no health insurance. Oh well.